My Anxiety During Midlife and Menopause
Do you know what sucks worse than insomnia during menopause? Anxiety during menopause. There’s nothing more irritating than being woken from a much needed sleep at 2am with hot flashes and heart palpitations, and a rapid fire of questions like:
Can menopause cause anxiety?
Does menopause cause panic attacks?
Does menopause make you anxious?
I toss and turn for a good hour hoping the questions will shush and let me get some shut-eye. it doesn’t work.
So what do I do during these night visits from my least favorite side-effect of menopause? After I toss and turn for a good hour hoping the questions will shush and let me get some shut-eye, I Google it of course. Because isn’t that every human’s best solution to their ails and aches these days?
After sifting through a dozen or so credible resources, they all say pretty much the same thing. It’s common due to hormonal fluctuations. Estrogen and progesterone decline. And so long as it’s not “too frequent” (consistent over 2+ weeks), or “too troubling” (wtf?), it’s manageable through remedies such as:
Exercise.
Eat healthy.
Talk to friends.
Connect with your family.
Get a hobby.
Consider hormone replacement therapy. Consult your physician for antidepressants.
most of these remedies aren’t very useful at 2:30am though.
But are those tips applicable to implement pronto at 2:30am?
I mean, I could probably rally the dogs to go for a moonlit stroll, make a smoothie, and only piss off everyone in my house, but the rest? Not so helpful right now, WebMD and ClevelandClinic. Not. So. Helpful.
Before menopause and midlife, my anxiety felt manageable, like an annoying little sister that kept borrowing my clothes then forgetting to return them. Anxiety during midlife? More like a boss with an axe to grind and I just so happen to be her favorite whetstone.
Did you remember to add X to the grocery list?
Don’t forget to update QuickBooks tomorrow.
Speaking of tomorrow, you have a lot to do. Let’s revisit your calendar so we can stare at it and redistribute tasks to other days.
And, would it be considered self-defense if I smother my husband with a pillow so I can sleep in peace and quiet and his snoring will finally cease and desist?!
One of my favorite YouTube sensations that pretty much captures all of these feelings and voices is Tiffany Jenkins (Juggling The Jenkins). When I first saw her videos about a year ago, she was still pretty new in the sense that when I mentioned her name to some friends, they looked at me sideways like I was pushing a new MLM platform. Now? She’s on everyone with anxiety’s radar. She’s hilarious, relatable, and feels more like a big sister than an influencer.
Still. At 3am I can only watch so many videos at the lowest possible volume setting.
During menopause anxiety has been the weirdest side effect beyond sleep deprivation. It creeps up during extended family visits, awkward silent pauses in conversation, or when I see a woman over 70 and realize I’m closer to her age now than I am my daughter’s. And let’s not forget how the anxiety then triggers moodiness and a new wave of irritation.
I don’t like being moody. but I don’t like being woken up with an anxiety or panic attack in the middle of the night either.
My moods shift direction moment to moment. Kind of like Colorado weather. But when my mood harnesses anxiety, anything is possible. Most people with anxiety disorders report feeling highly irritable when they’re at the peak of an anxiety episode, so I guess it shouldn’t come as a surprise when it happens.
Yet, for me it still does. Every. Time.
I don’t like being moody. Nor do I like being woken up with an anxiety or panic attack. However, when it happens, there’s not a lot that can be done except wait it out.
Anxiety during menopause can drive me bonkers and send me into a fit of mood swinging controversy, but it’s just another part of the process. It’s part of my menopause story.
Crystals for anxiety - amethyst, onyx, citrine, and selenite - have been something I’ve explored to help. I have a selenite wand next to my bed, a small chunk of amethyst in my dining room, and a nice sized piece of citrine on my windowsill. Sometimes the selenite helps when I hold it or rest it on my chest while practicing breathing exercises and meditating on a relaxing mantra like “this too shall pass.” It sounds crazy, and may very well be, but I’ve found it more useful than pacing the floors at 4am or scrolling through Facebook videos for solace.
Here’s what I’ve learned so far in midlife with anxiety during menopause: it can drive me bonkers and send me into a fit of mood swinging controversy, but it’s just another part of the process. It’s part of my menopause story. I do make my fitness and diet a daily priority, talk to friends and family sometimes more often than they’d probably like, and almost always have a new hobby to explore, but I haven’t reached the point of debilitating anxiety yet. I haven’t reached the level of “fuck it, I’m gonna give HRT and/or antidepressants a try.
Maybe it’s because I’m still early in my menopause rhapsody. Maybe it’s just a little speed bump alerting there are bigger potholes ahead. Or, maybe I’ll just worry and make a list of questions in my psyche - side-effects, risks, dependency issues.
It’s only 5am. Let me Google it…
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